This pretty lady. My mother. She’s known as “Sandy”, “Sandra”, “Mom”, “Momma/Mama”, “Mimi” and even “BOFUS”.
OK, tell the truth…did you laugh at that last one? BOFUS?
BOFUS was a moniker my dad coined for them as a couple…he pronounced it “BOFUS” for “bof of us”…and then he’d grin his silly grin and laugh. The nickname for them stuck!
Mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease in 2017; a few months after dad passed away. The truth is, in retrospect, she was showing signs before he passed, but we all attributed her behaviors to stress due to dad’s illnesses and declining health.
The week of his funeral it became very clear to me that something else…besides stress was going on. She was having trouble discerning the time of day…like morning, afternoon and night. She’d lie down for a nap in the afternoon and wake up believing it was the next day. You get the drift.
Fast forward to current time and it’s been quite a journey. She lived in her own home for nearly a year after dad passed; until it became unsafe for her to be alone much of the time. We moved her into Assisted Living where she lived for a year, then we moved her to Memory Care, where she lived until late October 2021. In late October 2021, she was hospitalized and her physician advised us it was time for hospice care. We made the decision as a family, to bring her home to her house and hospice at home.
Now, nearly a year later, Mom is doing better than any of us anticipated. The Alzheimer’s continues to progress and physically she is a bit weaker. I believe she’s lived this additional year because my family is doing an amazing job of caring for her. I am grateful for their caregiving and advocacy for her care…most especially my sister who is her primary caregiver.
My sister and I talk about how we feel “robbed” of this time with mom. Yes, she’s physically present, and there are moments where you feel a connection, but mostly the essence of who mom was is disappearing. We cling to memories and those moments of connection. There are definitely still moments of joy…there are also many difficult moments as well.
Alzheimer’s (and other dementias) is a terrible disease. I use my Red Aspen small business to raise money to be able to give more away to organizations that help fund Alzheimer’s awareness, caregiver support and most of all research!! I donate a portion of all my personal sales; this effort is not sponsored, supported or endorsed by Red Aspen.
When you shop with me, you help us fight Alzheimer’s!
Mimi is very definitely my WHY.
We love you, Mom…we’re fighting to find a cure for this awful disease.